Empathetic Overdrive
“That dumbass driver just….” I know many of us could finish that sentence rather colorfully.
Or how about this one: “Bob makes my life so miserable at work. Why should I have to do his job and mine just so things get done right?”
Or maybe you didn’t have your coffee yet and someone was just too perky, thereby causing gleefully vicious daydreams of putting their head in the toilet bowl and flushing it. I confess I am the overly joyous morning person so I would appreciate any patience you could muster.
Everybody has experienced feelings like these, emotions that are projected outward from yourself toward someone or something else, but what about empathy? What about taking the feelings of another inward?
According to Wikipedia, “empathy is often characterized as the ability to "put oneself into another's shoes", or to in some way experience the outlook or emotions of another being within oneself, a sort of emotional resonance.”
Have you ever experienced someone else’s emotions or felt like you touched their soul? Have you ever identified with a painful situation so much that it moved you to tears? I know that for some it is difficult to imagine how someone else feels, much less actually experience it but when it happens, it can be an extremely powerful event that stays in your memory.
A few times in my life I have encountered what I can only describe as empathetic overdrive. One instance was seeing paddles and CPR being used on someone in an ambulance. I was instantly overcome with grief and a kind of ache in my stomach. It felt like the air had been sucked from the car I was driving. By the time I got to Scott’s dorm I was crying hysterically and his roommates thought they were going to have to beat up some jerk for taking advantage of me. It took a while for me to spit out what had happened. That was not a great plug for the emotional stability of womanhood, I must say.
I’ve also said hello to someone at church and walked away feeling such a heaviness and anger that it was painful. Scott pointed out that it could have been the Holy Spirit giving me a glimpse of what that person was experiencing that day.
Last night I felt a neighbor’s pain when they lost their home to fire. It was all I could do not to run to help the firemen, bathrobe and all. Spitting on the fire would have made me feel better than I did standing on the front porch watching the family’s memories go up in flames. Fear and frustration and sadness were overwhelming. All I could muster was, “Oh, Lord. Oh, God. Please be with them. Please let them be safe.” Over and over, that’s all I could pray.
Then today in bible study, I was reminded about how Jesus felt our pain. He was empathetic to this degree often times. When the bible said, “Jesus was moved with compassion,” it often meant that He felt their pain in His gut. Strong’s dictionary translates the Greek word for compassion in Matthew 14:14 as something felt in the bowels. When Jesus saw the 5,000 on the shore waiting to hear Him speak, I imagine He was overcome by His wrenching gut and had to heal them in order to relieve His own pain.
I think He empathized with each one of us on the cross the day He died. Each tear shed, each sinful act committed, every hurtful word uttered. He experienced it all. I caused Him to feel pain, madness, frustration, the whole gamut of emotions used in my sin. And yet He still loves me.
Can I love that much? Can I take the empathetic overdrive to the point He did and does by coming alongside someone instead of running away from their baggage? I’m learning. It’s not easy but I know that when I have asked God for help in pursuing or listening or doing whatever HE wants me to do with someone, He has helped me use that overdrive as a tool for understanding and loving.
I’m so grateful that He never ran away from my emotional garbage. I think I can bear the weight of pain with a friend as we take it to the foot of the cross. I owe Him so much more than that.
Or how about this one: “Bob makes my life so miserable at work. Why should I have to do his job and mine just so things get done right?”
Or maybe you didn’t have your coffee yet and someone was just too perky, thereby causing gleefully vicious daydreams of putting their head in the toilet bowl and flushing it. I confess I am the overly joyous morning person so I would appreciate any patience you could muster.
Everybody has experienced feelings like these, emotions that are projected outward from yourself toward someone or something else, but what about empathy? What about taking the feelings of another inward?
According to Wikipedia, “empathy is often characterized as the ability to "put oneself into another's shoes", or to in some way experience the outlook or emotions of another being within oneself, a sort of emotional resonance.”
Have you ever experienced someone else’s emotions or felt like you touched their soul? Have you ever identified with a painful situation so much that it moved you to tears? I know that for some it is difficult to imagine how someone else feels, much less actually experience it but when it happens, it can be an extremely powerful event that stays in your memory.
A few times in my life I have encountered what I can only describe as empathetic overdrive. One instance was seeing paddles and CPR being used on someone in an ambulance. I was instantly overcome with grief and a kind of ache in my stomach. It felt like the air had been sucked from the car I was driving. By the time I got to Scott’s dorm I was crying hysterically and his roommates thought they were going to have to beat up some jerk for taking advantage of me. It took a while for me to spit out what had happened. That was not a great plug for the emotional stability of womanhood, I must say.
I’ve also said hello to someone at church and walked away feeling such a heaviness and anger that it was painful. Scott pointed out that it could have been the Holy Spirit giving me a glimpse of what that person was experiencing that day.
Last night I felt a neighbor’s pain when they lost their home to fire. It was all I could do not to run to help the firemen, bathrobe and all. Spitting on the fire would have made me feel better than I did standing on the front porch watching the family’s memories go up in flames. Fear and frustration and sadness were overwhelming. All I could muster was, “Oh, Lord. Oh, God. Please be with them. Please let them be safe.” Over and over, that’s all I could pray.
Then today in bible study, I was reminded about how Jesus felt our pain. He was empathetic to this degree often times. When the bible said, “Jesus was moved with compassion,” it often meant that He felt their pain in His gut. Strong’s dictionary translates the Greek word for compassion in Matthew 14:14 as something felt in the bowels. When Jesus saw the 5,000 on the shore waiting to hear Him speak, I imagine He was overcome by His wrenching gut and had to heal them in order to relieve His own pain.
I think He empathized with each one of us on the cross the day He died. Each tear shed, each sinful act committed, every hurtful word uttered. He experienced it all. I caused Him to feel pain, madness, frustration, the whole gamut of emotions used in my sin. And yet He still loves me.
Can I love that much? Can I take the empathetic overdrive to the point He did and does by coming alongside someone instead of running away from their baggage? I’m learning. It’s not easy but I know that when I have asked God for help in pursuing or listening or doing whatever HE wants me to do with someone, He has helped me use that overdrive as a tool for understanding and loving.
I’m so grateful that He never ran away from my emotional garbage. I think I can bear the weight of pain with a friend as we take it to the foot of the cross. I owe Him so much more than that.
Comments
Empathy has actually been something I have been thinking about lately. I honestly can't think of a single characteristic that should describe the Christian life that fits better then empathy. To me it's even bigger then selflessness, it's not just a lack of self, but a complete fullness of love, care, and emotion for others.